Sunday, June 11, 2006

I heart pain.


O wow I am hurting really really badly right now! I do not think that any amount of painkillers will make this go away! I feel like Josh is mostly responsible for my pain right now. After we ate dinner, we went for a walk on the beach to settle our stomachs. On the beach we ran into some friends and they were out surfing. They ran up to us and started a conversation, and in the process I ended up stripping down to my board shorts grabbing a board and running towards the ocean! Oh man you guys can see where this is going right?? I don't know how I ended up in the ocean! It was like I had no control over my body once the board was put in my arms!

The first wave that I caught was just to get a feel for the board. It had awesome balance and there was something going on with the fin that I really dug. But I did not know what it was because I didn't check out the bottom of the board when I got it. Anyway the second wave was when I really got to see what the board could do. Then when I was paddling back to catch my third that's when it happened! THE PAIN! O MAN IT WAS INTENSE! But I didn't care I was already back in the action and this time I went for it and I caught some serious air. It was beautiful! It felt so good! And then I landed and all of a sudden it didn't feel so good... I let the next wave carry me back to shore, and then I let Josh carry me to the car.

If I weren't so worried about what he would think, I would have cried actual tears that whole drive to my apartment! Lucky for me my friend has a HUGE hot tub in her apartment and Josh helped me get it started before he took off. I soaked in that tub for like 2 hours until I knew the pain killers had fully taken effect. Then I got out and I had a few beers with my friend. Afterwards she rubbed emu oil all over me. Her mom is a holistic healer and teaches accupressure, so she knows how to give one hell of a massage. I was in heaven the entire time that she was touching me. Now that its over and its almost time for me to take more pain killers, its all coming back pretty strong. I really hate pain!

The most insane thing about tonight was that I enjoyed it even though I am pretty sure that I won't be able to stand up in the morning. I love the ocean and I don't care about this kind of pain. I think that if this is what I have to deal with in order to surf, I would totally deal with it, but I still wouldn't come out to other surfers. I just think that the pain of whatever the fall out would be would hurt 1000 times more than whatever my back can dish out. Did that make sense?? I am drunk on pain killers and beer, so I am not sure...

This is a picture that I made in my class demonstration today. I was kind of inspired by the Byzantine period paintings. Its actually a self portrait in a really abstract sort of way... But whatever! I also got a little bit lazy with the background, but after the first 45 minutes, I thought that everybody was getting a bit bored.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

oooo that sucks that you are in so much pain, but it seems like this is all your own doing though. You should be more careful with what you choose to do with your time when you are injured. If you do things like this you might injur yourself further or just take extra long to get better. I do love how you call the people that you ran into friends and Josh calls them fans! Is this part of the reason why you struggle so much with coming out? Are you worried about your life in the public eye>? I could not stand thinking that people could walk up to me at any time and start talking to me like they are my friends and we have never met! I would be creeped out! I don't know how you do it.

Anonymous said...

I love this picture! Its so sacreligous! Its funny also. SO you have fans?? I would not doubt it. You really seem to excel at whatever it is that you do! You art is awesome, you have a boyfriend that is really into you, you are a sponsored surfer and you have a lot of people comment on your blog daily! You are to cool for school dude!

Anonymous said...

You still have an entire day of training today don't you? I hope that you are able to get through it! I love this picture that you posted today! Its really funny. What is up with the octopus? I love it, but I am curious to here your thoughts on what its all about. Well I guess that you can't toot your own horn, but it sounds a lot like you are already somebody in the surfing world. And you are not struggling with the fact that if you become somebody you will have to hide who you are. You are struggling with the fact that you are already somebody and people are going to want to start to know more about you once you start to get better known in this world! I see that as a blessing and a curse. Keep your head up.