Sunday, September 06, 2009

Vacation fun

Driving in England fucking sucks ass! FINE ! I can get used to driving on the wrong side of the road and shifting gears towards me instead of away from me, BUT what the shit is up with all those fucking traffic circles!? What the hell do British people have against a NORMAL GODDMAN intersection!? After two days of getting lost and almost dying in a plethora of near fatal car crashes all over the English country side, I am proud to report that I am not dead! But this has nothing to do with my proswess as a driver and everything to do with the rest of England being car ninjas with cat like reflexes and having the patience of a saint.

I am loving my traveling companion right now because of how independent he is! This trip I am feeling the need to wander the world alone and occasionally have a buddy to chat about it with. This week I am staying at a hostel while my buddy is busy hanging with friends on the other side of the city. We are meeting up at the end of the week and comparing crazy stories before we head off to our next destination and do it all over again. I just don’t have the energy to entertain my friends because I feel like that has always been my role and I am liking the solo time because it makes me feel like I don’t always have to put on a show.

Walking into my room at this hostel felt like stepping onto the set of a softcore porn shoot! As I opened the door all I saw was a flurry of naked men as they ran around the room snapping each other with their towels. Seeing me walk in did not deter them from their raucous nakedness and they kind of waved me off as they kept at it. Usually I would have just laughed this off and continued with what I was doing. However me not having had sex since June has made me a little bit of a horndog. So I kind of just stood there with a growing erection as these fit guys chased each other around the room. Once things settled down we were able to get the introductions out of the way and we ended up having a pretty decent time hanging out and having fun.

For some reason I am having the worst jetlag of my entire life. I have yet to recover from my flight and I haven’t been able to get a single night’s rest. Most days I end up taking a late afternoon nap and fucking up my sleep cycle all over again! I am extremely agitated and grumpy from not being able to acclimate myself as quickly as I normally do. I think this is the first sign of old age. Speaking of age, I have been carded at every bar I have been to in London the last 5 days! What the shit is up with that!? The drinking age is 18 and I at least look 18 if not older. But EVERY SINGLE TIME I ORDER A BEER, they want to see my ID! Seriously, its kind of embarrassing that at 23 I still can’t pass as a legal drinker in a country where 14 year olds walk into stores and purchase alcohol with no drama.

Nothing I have done on my “vacation” so far has been relaxing. This next part of my vacation should do wonders for settling my nerves. Its going to be all beaches, surfing, and lounging until I am so relaxed that I start to forget that stress even exists. Then and only then will I begin to tackle the big issues and life drama that I have been putting off all summer.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I trust you will have an amazing time in Europe. Yes, travel itself is stressful, but now it sounds as if you have plans for a great time. Enjoy.

Jason said...

Don't try and fool yourself homie! You don't look a day over 15. give it a decade or so, you'll get there eventually.

Trevor said...

it is the destiny of every man to want what he can't have. everybody else would kill to look like a teenager well after those years have ended. you should enjoy it while it lasts.

RGB said...

You guys need to shut the hell up! You guys are just jealous that you look older than my dad and you guys are my age and younger!