Wednesday, September 01, 2010

Rocky road to recovery

Sorry I have been missing for so long, this month has been THE SUCK! I fully recovered from my shitty lungs at the beginning of the month, but then the real recovery process began. Being stuck in a fucking bed for a month, fucked up my body like you wouldn’t believe! I have bone and joint issues all over the place, then you throw in my sciatica and ligament damage in my knee, and now you should be imagining some of the most painful pain anybody has ever pained.

Every morning in order to keep from shooting myself in the head from all the previously mentioned pain, I used to go through an hour long stretching/yoga routine followed by a VERY hot shower and then copious amounts of bengay as needed. There’s also some super strong ibuprofen to reduce swelling, and the occasional cortisone shot when the pills just weren’t enough. A large portion of all that had to stop when I was bed ridden for one reason or another, so my body just became progressively more stiff and painful until I got to the point where I was on so many painkillers that there are entire days I don’t even remember.

The most frustrating thing about my life right now is how I want to do so much more than my body is willing to let me do. I want to touch my toes, I want to take my skateboard down to the beach, I want to catch a wave, I want to go for a jog with my boyfriend and my dog; but alas I can not do any of those things because I am barely at the point where I can walk to the bathroom without the aid of my walker! I have had all these ailments for a while now, it’s the side effect of living my lifestyle, but it’s always seemed manageable up until the point where it wasn’t. I am 2 months from my 25th birthday and I am pretty sure my skeleton more closely resembles a 76yr old.

Being stuck in one place has really given me the time to think about the fact that I’m not getting any younger, and this body of mine is the only one I am ever going to get; so it’s probably time that I start doing a better job at taking care of it. I have seen specialists for all my different issues, from my back, to my knee, to my ever so slightly dislocated shoulder that has since awkwardly healed over without ever being properly put back into place. I got fresh x-rays (by the way did you know that when you get x-rayed you can still VERY clearly see your penis in the x-rays!? It’s really funny and I ALMOST posted them because I got a serious chuckle out of that but then I realized that this is not that kind of blog and it will NEVER be that kind of blog. So sorry) and had them scrutinized by all the said specialists, and together we came up with several treatments to take care of most of my issues.

While all this was happening life still went on and now I am struggling to play catch up. I am currently making plans to go to Europe for a week because I have a piece that’s part of this HUGE collection and I absolutely have to be there to see it! Things with Brad and I are still a little bit tense and I need to figure out a way to smooth things out with him which means I need to figure out a way to get passed my huge ego and apologize. I have promised my services as a coder to a friend of mine for this massive computer program she’s designing. And I have about a dozen other odd jobs in completely random and unrelated fields that need attention yesterday. The medical bills totalled well into the hundred thousands and I have shitty medical insurance, so I really need to crack the whip and get some work done.


John said...

Are you going to be talking more this show you are a part of? I miss when you used to post your paintings and photographs here. You are a very talented artist and it would be great to see how you've grown in that sense.

Mind Of Mine said...

Shit man!

Sounds dire! I am sending out positive pain free vibes. (I don't pray!) I hope it gets bearable soon.

I think it would be hilarious if you posted the x-ray shots!

RGB said...

I feel like this all sounded a lot worse than it really is. I don't feel like any one thing is too difficult to manage... It's just that initial getting up and moving part that's the most difficult. Towards the middle of my day, sometimes I forget that there's actually anything wrong with me at all. Thanks for the positive energy though, I am all for that!

mike said...

i missed your posts! glad to hear you're doin better. if I was a praying man, i'd pray for you, but i'm an atheist. but good energy channeled your way none the less.